Today, as each day, I continue my journey within by embarking on a 10 day Vipassana meditation retreat. This experience allows a complete withdrawal from all worldly comforts and distractions. I have never felt so sure of moving forward on my path than I do about this opportunity before me.
The reactions that I have received from my family and friends have really made all of us laugh! For those who know me well, it is extremely laughable that I would stop talking for 10 minutes, let alone 240 hours! I also have a love of music, blogging, social media and journaling; all of which will not be part of this retreat. Even my own son has teased me about seeing me back home by the weekend!
Underneath the good natured betting pools and incredulous responses, I am overwhelmed by the tremendous love, support and encouragement I have been blessed with! Truly the only thing that warranted serious consideration before I accepted this honor was whether Julian believed in me and what I am trying to achieve. And Julian having the love and support of my parents, my ex-husband and my ex-fiance all working together gives me the freedom to go with zero regret.
Over the past few weeks, I have been mulling over exactly why this opportunity is before me. I have spent the majority of my life with a subtle, unnamed restlessness and a constant searching for ... something to ground me and complete me. I have looked to so many people, places, things to provide the answer. I have taken so many steps down so many wrong paths with the realization that what has directed my past actions was NEVER my own intuition.
Obviously, all of those detours provided invaluable lessons, so they were not the wrong paths. As I continue my transformation - not into a new person, but rather a re-connection to my authentic self - I realize that I must peel away all of these remaining layers of impressions, judgements, pleasures, aversions and be still and silent.
I have had the extreme fortune in my meditations and yoga practices to experience fleeting moments of satcitananda - pure, sublime BLISS. These moments are extremely rare, and I am not sure if my description can actually do it justice ... Any yoga or meditation session focuses primarily on the breath as a focal point and a means to regulate and control prana and the chatterings of the mind. There comes a moment where the breath and thoughts slowly fade and what remains is a purely physical joyful sensation. When even that sensation has dissipated, what remains is BLISS - pure BEING. You feel ONE with EVERYTHING and NOTHING. This is your true nature, your true and natural state of consciousness!
And do you know what it is? Pure love, compassion and understanding of all beings. I believe that we are all brought into this physical world in that state - and the experience of physical life and our mind's reactions to things, whether enjoyment or aversion, remove us from that perfect state of non-attachment, equanimity and bliss.
I have only experienced this state of being a few times and never for a significant time period. Buddhists and Hindus believe that if one can maintain the relaxed, unstriving, completely at ease state for 48 minutes - that person has reached enlightenment. Not just for this lifetime but for all of our lifetimes That state is the true and highest form of our selves. To truly know one self is to know everyone. And through this knowledge and insight, we can conquer our doubts, fears, joys, pains, aversions and pleasures - ultimately conquering all things.
Vipassana mediation is the method that the Buddha himself used to attain his enlightenment. I have no expectations or particular thoughts on outcomes. I will just be there and be present.
See you in 10 days, and I am sure you will enjoy my silence as much as I will!!
NAMASTE
And do you know what it is? Pure love, compassion and understanding of all beings. I believe that we are all brought into this physical world in that state - and the experience of physical life and our mind's reactions to things, whether enjoyment or aversion, remove us from that perfect state of non-attachment, equanimity and bliss.
I have only experienced this state of being a few times and never for a significant time period. Buddhists and Hindus believe that if one can maintain the relaxed, unstriving, completely at ease state for 48 minutes - that person has reached enlightenment. Not just for this lifetime but for all of our lifetimes That state is the true and highest form of our selves. To truly know one self is to know everyone. And through this knowledge and insight, we can conquer our doubts, fears, joys, pains, aversions and pleasures - ultimately conquering all things.
Vipassana mediation is the method that the Buddha himself used to attain his enlightenment. I have no expectations or particular thoughts on outcomes. I will just be there and be present.
See you in 10 days, and I am sure you will enjoy my silence as much as I will!!
NAMASTE
