Thursday, April 12, 2012

Social Media Experiment

Soooo... It all started with a BOY!! A super amazing, driven, accomplished, inspired, inspiring man who was for whatever unimaginable reason ... Just not that into me!! Which of course made him even more irresistible! Lol.

So since I am 40 and not 18, I realize that it's much healthier for me to date men who actually are interested in me. NOTE: I am looking for more than good on paper - I need chemistry!! But, of course, looking good on paper is not optional.

So where else can you find out everything you need to know to quickly pre-screen a date than a dating website? Ok, I can already sense you judging me; trust me, I shared your derision of the overall desperate nature of one who has resorted to online dating. That being said, I actually know quite a few happy couples and marriages resulting from online dating, so I tried to go in with an open mind.

I had already joined this particular site a few months prior, but it was such a CHORE wading through hundreds of emails and 'winks' from desperate losers that I had literally let the account languish.

So my experiment was to go on 30 dates in 30 days with the following objectives:

1. Actually go on 30 dates in 30 days!
2. Test the validity of the theory "nothing gets you over the last one like getting under the next one."
3. Find out what kind of people are actually actively on these sites.
4. Is it a good way to meet and connect with people?
5. How honest are people on these websites?

Soooo it took a few days to select potential dates, respond to emails, exchange numbers and actually plan and schedule two dozen dates! It was pretty cyclical and took a lot of time and effort - but the potential good that I am doing for society kept me motivated. Since these are essentially first dates, my approach was to basically get in and get out!!

So here are the stats of the experiment - if I had more time, I would figure out the economic impact of all my dates, but my memory is already fading fast.

24 dates in 30 days
Oldest date: 54
Youngest date: 28
Yoga dates: 2
Coffee dates: 7
Cocktail dates: 12
Brunch dates: 2
Lunch dates: 1
Dinner dates: no way!!
# of guys who lied on profile: 0!
# of girls who lied on profile: 1! I only lied about my age but came clean immediately upon meeting the date
# of guys who I told about the experiment: 3

Soooo what did I learn from this experience?

1. There really are so many amazing men out there who sincerely want to be in a relationship and share their lives with that special someone.
2. The stigma of online dating is unique to those of us who did not grow up with the Internet! The millennials generally have no issues with meeting a date online.
3. Online dating is a viable method for busy professionals to meet and connect with the opposite sex.
4. You cannot judge a person by their stats alone! People have their own stories and in generalizing a certain type, you can really miss out on some interesting personalities beneath the surface.
5. Sometimes there's nothing interesting going on beneath the surface!
6. There are many extremely successful i.e. PAID men who use dating websites
7. Men really really really dig chicks who do yoga
8. I am a pretty good fucking catch!! Lol.

Some fun facts:
No. 5 farted during yoga class, and I could NOT contain my laughter
No. 9 dropped down and did 40 pushups at the bar at Morton's Naperville during a crowded Wednesday night!!
No. 14 and I had actually met at a club back in 2005 and ended up having a late night/early morning breakfast that night. He actually still had my old 312 phone number in his cell phone!!
No. 17 - 54 year old white executive - made me a "mix CD" with Rihanna, Flo-rida, Drake, Nikki Minaj and others!
No. 18 invented roasted nuts kiosks!!
No. 24 is a vegetarian!! 15 years strong and is in unbelievable shape

So the moral of the story: it doesn't matter how you meet someone; what's important is the connection that you make. I honestly can say that I had a great time with each individual and did connect with each one on some level. Approaching people with an open heart and mind as you get to know them is never time wasted. Even if there's no love connection, you have made a new contact and you never know where that can lead or potentially serve you in the future!!

So single people, it was a tough job, but I took one for the team!!! You're welcome. (:

7 comments:

  1. I love this!! So are we now using blogs instead of waiting on Oprah? :)

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  2. Yes, blogs are replacing Oprah's letter! We can now do multiple letters anytime of the day or night!! Lol

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  3. You are truly a pioneer in sociological research! Nice work. But you didn't say whether any rated a second date...

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  4. Girl!! Love it! I'm so glad you found out all these truths & kicked the negative myths away! My step-sister is a happily drop dead gorgeous married to an on-line dater guy! Love the blog hot stuff!!!

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  5. Jenn, I am happy to share more details offline!!! (;
    Kim, agreed!! Too often we can get caught up in what others think or will think that we miss out on opportunities!! I need my approval, no one else's!

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  6. This is awesome. I actually do this on a daily basis... haahhaaa.

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